should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
