Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
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