I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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