You really coming over, don't trick.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize