i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Randomize
