I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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