I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
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