if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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