I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
We had to coat check the pizza.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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