laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
