erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
