I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
