I must be too annoying 4 u.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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