You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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