he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
