chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
