Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
