GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
