just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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