Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
where does the pee come out of this thing
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
