good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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