we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize