Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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