i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
