come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
