It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize