Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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