Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize