Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
