just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
