Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just cut my nipple shaving
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
