C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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