belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
