There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
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