YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize