Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Randomize
