No awkward lesbian experiences without me
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize