dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Randomize
