She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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