Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize