Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
