she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
