I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
