His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
