Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
He has the fingertips of a God
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
