I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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