Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
