Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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