what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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