no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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