did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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